Deceptively spring-like indoors…
…with “adult” used loosely here, of course. I once read that we’re not fully actualized as our “adult” selves until the age of 25—a fact I’d rather not expose to my mother knowing full well that doing so just might bite me in the ass come time during our next argument (hi, Mom). But hey—I do it all selflessly in the name of science and good writing, no? Here’s to honesty, journalism, and on my part, feigned adulthood at the ripe old age of 21.
But I digress.
To think that just a few years ago I was still praying (okay, fine, more like flushing toilets in sync with my friends, wearing my Christmas flannels inside out, etc.) for that 5 a.m. school’s cancelled, stay safe! call. I don’t like snow anymore, much less harbor anything less than annoyance at the prospect of a snow day. Adults have places to go, things to do, and snow-induced traffic does no good for the 21st-century mind, body, or soul. Plus, what’s a girl to wear when it’s snowing? Once it’s snowed? Once it’s iced over, or once it starts to melt? What, exactly, is the style protocol for light flurries versus snowstorms? Two-inch fluff versus nearly one-foot of pile-up? What God-forsaken shoe must we wear?!
I’m not sure if I have the utmost respect for or consider those statement-coat wearing (beautiful, albeit useless in terms of actual warmth), stiletto-trodding women absolutely insane. How does one remain chic (it’s relative at this point, really) even in below-freezing temperatures? It’s possible—streetstyle snaps are digital proof—but is it actually feasible for real people? Is it sane?
So while the likes of SJP lounge about in watercolored Chanel, I’ve resorted to less fabulous—though far warmer—things. I’ve come to accept this as my armour against the snow-fallen world, and have learned that over-the-knee boots are saviors in terms of practicality and attempts at looking presentable despite freezing conditions, that thigh-high boots would actually be ideal (because that extra three-five inches of leather is crucial to sustaining warmth), that earrings heighten all feelings of coldness, and that cashmere-lined, leather gloves are essential. I’ll wear my puffy coats with pride! I am bundled, hear me roar!
But really, I’ll just settle for you making way as I come through. With winter jackets comes an increased, physical territory of at least three inches extending outwards as well as a slight, but unwanted waddle from that growth in girth. Moving room would be greatly appreciated. (So would a hot latte.)
. . .
xx
Your turn. Thoughts?