Five Things (5.15.20)

It’s been a year and a half since my last list.

1. Somewhat out of the blue, I asked my friend for a tarot reading. I’m still buzzing from it (and am grateful for the insight—or affirmation, however you choose to view these things).

2. On Wednesday, my dad dropped off homemade walnut “cake” (or bread, by American tastebuds’ standards) to pair with my morning coffee. It was divine. The pairing, the thought, and the treat.

3. Turns out, Wednesday was my lucky day: a different friend also did a driveby, leaving a bouquet of white peonies at my doorstep—a belated birthday gift, since everything was shut down during my birthday (when COVID-19 was at its worst). I immediately trimmed the stems and arranged them (haphazardly) in a vase. Within half an hour, the tightly-bowed buds bloomed.

It’s the little things.

4. I’ve slowly become a morning person. Part of it is the physical removal of stress: my home is a safe space, and after years of 14-hour workdays, I’m forced to relax instead of running to work, to class, to rehearsal, repeat. There’s no rush. There’s no energy spent balancing personalities—which can be exhausting as an introvert—and less spent accommodating everyone else’s needs before mine.

Instead, I’m allowed to be indulgent as I want. I rise with clarity. Make a coffee, light a candle, start my book of the day. I’m able to work in peace for the most part—finally!—which is an underappreciated blessing for someone who writes and strategizes. Fewer interruptions have led to better flow. More focus. Efficiency.

For this, I’m grateful. Going back into the office will be an adjustment.

5. Also a foreseeable, likely difficult adjustment: re-training my body to fit into acceptable workwear. Robes, oversized knits, slinky slips, cozy sweats, eclectic looks that (unfortunately) have little place in an office, I will miss you. And in the meantime, wear the heck out of you while I still can.

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xx